You learn something when you listen to old people. They ain’t all fools. You don’t get to be old being no fool.
Richard Pryor At 98-years young, Art Schallock is the world’s oldest former Major League Baseball player. George Elder (perfect name for it) – who pitched for the 1949 St. Louis Browns – held that distinction until July 22, 2022, when he died at the age of 101.
Schallock was born in Mill Valley, California, in 1924, 13 years before the Golden Gate Bridge was built near his birthplace. Mill Valley is where Jack Finney’s novel The Invasion of the Body Snatchers was set. Carolyn Jones, who later played Morticia in the original Adam’s Family television series, played Teddy Belicec in the 1956 movie version.
But before this column becomes decidedly morbid, let’s get back to the topic at hand: Art Schallock.
The future big leaguer threw a no-hitter in March of 1941 for Tamalpais High School.
Two weeks after his high school graduation, he was drafted.
Schallock served as a radio operator aboard an aircraft carrier, the U.S.S. Coral Sea, during World War II, and participated in several battles in the Pacific – some involving Kamikaze attacks – according to his biography on sabr.org.
Schallock made his majorleague debut June 16, 1951, after being traded by the Dodgers. To make room for Schallock, the Yankees had to send down a 19-year-old outfielder who would eventually hit 536 homers for the Yanks: Mickey Mantle.
Schallock pitched for the Yankees for five years and finished his major-league career with the Baltimore Orioles on Sept. 23, 1955. He has three World Series rings.
Schallock has lived more than twice as long as Hall of Famer Gil Hodges, who was also born in 1924 and died in 1972 at the age of 47 after playing a round of golf in Florida during a baseball strike.
I can’t help wondering what might go through Schallock’s mind as he looks out upon this chaotic postmodern world.
When he was born, 35-year-old Adolph Hitler was serving what turned out to be a nine-month prison term for his part in a failed Nazi coup attempt. This event and the trial that followed made Hitler a star.
It is worth noting that Congress passed the Indian Citizenship Act that year which granted American Indians citizenship in their native country. Hmmm?
On the day Schallock turned 18, Princess Elizabeth (now Queen) registered for war service, whatever that means. Later that same week, some 1,200
Reporter Jews were murdered by German death squads in Poland.
History is a ghastly catalog of horror tales.
On Schallock’s 21st birthday, Soviet and American troops, allies at the time, met at the Elbe River as Germany began to collapse. April 25 is now known as Elbe Day, which symbolized hope for peace in the post-war world. What we got was a prolonged standoff between the Soviets and the Americans.
But by the time the slightly built left hander from Marin County retired from his post baseball working life in 1989, the Berlin Wall was at last coming down and it appeared a new era of harmony and cooperation among nations might actually be possible.
I’d like to ask Art Schallock what he thinks our chances are now with China posturing and Russia involved in a destructive war with Ukraine.
Time will tell, I suppose. But let’s turn away from the atrocities of the past and give some of our attention to the youngest players in Major League Baseball.
The absolute youngest would be Wander Franco of the Tampa Bay Rays who was born on March 1, 2001. I think I have a frozen pizza older than that.
The 10th-youngest player is Reid Detmers of the California Angels who is only 22 and has already pitched a no-hitter.
Detmers helped keep the Braves from sweeping the Angels back in June when he threw five shutout innings in a 9-1 win.
Atlanta’s youngest player is only six days older than Franco. Michael “Money” Harris was born on March 7, 2001. Spencer Strider is 23, and Ronald Acuna, Ian Anderson and William Contreras are all 24.
These young men are the future of the Atlanta Braves, a sentiment which makes you feel kind of warm and fuzzy, doesn’t it. So, let’s sing a few bars of “We Are the World” written by Lionel Ritchie and Michael Jackson. We are the world. We are the children. We are the ones who make a brighter day, so let’s start giving. There’s a choice we’re making. We’re saving our own lives. It’s true we’ll make a better day, just you and me. Oy Vey! Now I feel positively nauseous. But maybe the Invasion of the Body Snatchers will one day resume, and the pod people will come back to Mill Valley to replace the population of planet Earth with soulless, robotic automatons incapable of human emotion. That would at least guarantee a Republican sweep of the midterm elections.
I’m kidding. Selah.